"you sound like a malay!"

today, my mom had just ruined my originally wonderful saturday. i thought i could have a nice day of hanging around the house, grazing through sweets(i have suddenly developed a taste for sweets), using the phone, watching the recorded shows i missed throughout the week, and sleeping.

ok, my mom wanted me to fetch my little sister for her piano lesson cos she has to work. i didnt agree cos i thought i couldnt go home after i her piano lesson and have to go out with my mom. in the end, she made my second sister go. and when my grandma found out, she got worried and asked me to go. so i decided to go cos we are going for a kfc meal after the lesson anyway. after that, three of us sisters would continue on our merry way home and laze the rest of our day away. sounds too good to be true? it is.

my mom HAD to call and tell them that we can go to my aunt's house after the lesson. they were estatic. i wasnt. i looked forward to lazing my day away with a bandito pockett meal for company. now that my mom told them, all that is gone. no goofing around with my sisters on the bus, no kfc meal, no splurging my money on chocalate for them at watsons, nothing. i felt betrayed. seriously, grossly, betrayed. and then, to make things worse, my second sister kept passing me the wrong message from my mom. first, she told me that my mom said that i CANNOT fetch them there because i disturbed my little sister when she was sleeping. second, she told me that my mom ordered EVERYONE to go to my aunt's house because my maternal grandmother kept urinating on the bed. check this out. my grandmother urinates on the bed, i HAVE to go there. where is the link? can someone enlighten me please?

and when i was calling my mom, she refused to pick up the phone until the 6th phone call. and then, she told me that i actually do not have to go and asked me why do i hate going there so much now? she also said that she knew what i was up to at home. what? i'm going to hog the phone? for your info, i spent less time on the phone than you would expect. i told her, all i want to do is stay at home, and watch tv. and she said "you sound like a malay you know that? EXACTLY like a malay." malay my ASS! talk to the hand. i'm going to shut off from you from now on.

i didnt fetch my little sister to her piano lesson. instead, i stayed at home and mourned the loss of my wonderful day snatched away by my mom. she rubbed it in again. she called and told me that she thinks i should leave the house and go to lance if i think staying at this house is upsetting me. upsetting me? ok, i am not unhappy here. my haven at home would be complete if i were to be able to get a handphone. and use it openly. i want to be able to sms in front of my mom and not have her making remarks like "oh, you reporting again?". i want to be able to call lance in front of my parents and not have them pissed off at me. i want to be able to go out with lance and tell my parents "bye, i'm going out with lance, will be back by 10!". is it too much to ask? aparently, it is. as for the handphone, i dont mind if i have to pay for everything by myself. i seriously dont mind. and if i can call lance in front of my parents, i dont mind having to pay for the part of the bill which i used. seriously. that is how much i want to have peace between me, lance, and my parents.

i had an awful day. now, i feel like i just wasted the day crying and watching tv. i feel like a piece of rubbish left at the bottom of the bin which even the rats wouldnt touch. that's what i am. rubbish.

repeat after me, RUBBISH!!!!!

i, amber aka yam shuhao am a piece of rubbish.

dont worry about me, after a good cry or two, i'll be fine. i wont go to me penknifey friend. i promise to whoever bothers to read and whoever cares.